Year A
Genesis 32:22-31
Psalm 17:1-7,16
Romans 9:1-5
Matthew 14:13-21

May the words of my mouth… O God… speak your Truth…

For the last several weeks… we’ve heard about how God’s Word… sown in good soil… can bear much fruit… up to one-hundred fold… we’ve heard about bad weeds sown among good wheat… and how it’s decided to deal with that later on… we’ve heard about what the Kingdom of Heaven is like… like mustard seeds and yeast which increase beyond imagination… and treasure and pearls so valuable… they’re worth selling everything you have in order to own them… kind of reminds me of what Jesus told the rich young man… to sell all he had… and give the money to the poor… and THEN come follow Jesus… to follow the Living Word…

But just before the Gospel’s opening verses… Jesus found out that the man he followed… his cousin… John the Baptist… to some degree his mentor… had been killed… beheaded… John’s disciples had just buried John’s body… and then came to tell Jesus… and it’s in this state of mind… in this state of emotion… that he goes by boat to a deserted place to grieve… but the crowds who were seeking him out… must have followed around the edge of the lake… to where he was headed… and when he went ashore… he saw them…

Jesus is in-between his darkest moment… and the dawn of a new movement… of God’s healing work… the text says that Jesus had compassion for them… but this was not simply a feeling of empathy… this word is not simply a noun… a thing that Jesus had… the Greek word allows us to understand… that Jesus compassioned… he felt and he acted… and as v. 14 says… he healed the sick…

And the Gospel tells another story about God’s abundance… and abundant giving… how five loaves and two fish… fed not only five-thousand men… and the perhaps six-thousand women and children those men brought along… and they were all fed and filled… and still… they collected twelve baskets of leftovers…

On one level… we understand that thousands of people were fed… we can’t get our heads around how that could be… we marvel at how at-odds that is… with what we think is possible… we marvel at its largeness… but do we marvel enough… do we also remember… on a deeper level… what Jesus said in Matthew 4:4… that one does not live by bread alone… but by every word that comes from the mouth of God… that God’s Word is life…

And did you notice… it was getting late… it was getting dark… and instead of allowing the disciples to send everyone away… instead of letting them go away hungry… did you notice… that what Jesus did with the five loaves and two fish… was take… bless… break… and give… Jesus fed them with God’s abundance…

It was also getting dark in our Jewish scripture story… and I think we can understand a certain fear of the dark… popular culture recognizes this… when it hints that the night is dark and full of terrors… night brings it’s own dangers… if you can’t see where you’re going… you can fall into a hole… and Jacob is afraid… he’s on his way home to make amends with his brother Esau… Jacob is seeking reconciliation for stealing his birthright and his blessing… but he’s afraid of not being forgiven… and so Jacob is prepared to offer Esau a gift of 550 animals… and that night… before they meet… in his apprehension… he wrestles with God…

Retired Presbyterian Pastor Patrick Willson… explains that the Greek word for a wrestling match… is agōn… and it’s from this word… that we get agōny… and antagōnist… the one with whom we struggle… Willson wrote that if we take this story seriously… we understand that God sometimes appears… as our antagonist… not necessarily an enemy… but one whom we must wrestle nonetheless… and as a result… Jacob is renamed Yisra-El… one who has striven with God and prevailed… and although he walks away with a limp… he is blessed… although he is wounded physically… he is being made whole spiritually…

But why would God wrestle with Jacob… as Psalm 8 asks… what are human beings that God is mindful of us… mortals that God cares for us… you might ask why the potter shapes the clay… you might ask why we read scripture… you might ask why we teach our children… this wrestling… this contending… is part of our formation… and God wrestles with us… because God loves us… God sets the rules for us… but in the same breath God offers forgiveness and grace… and when we’re so busy… and perhaps so scared that we can’t move towards God… then God moves towards us… God wrestles away our insecurities… so we too can be faithful to the Word we hear… and act on it with fidelity… God antagonizes us into being named anew… and we may have our own unique limps… but we are blessed and being made whole… not like a light switch… not going from completely off to completely on… but more like a rheostat… allowing increasing amounts of power through… so our light can shine more brightly… so we can put it on a lamp stand…

Jacob is afraid of seeing his brother… of coming face-to-face with him… his gift is a peace offering… intended to assuage Esau’s anger… Jacob would have been more afraid of coming face-to-face with God… because to do so would mean death… but afterwards… Jacob names the place Peniel… saying… for I have seen God face to face… and yet my life is preserved… and the next morning… when the two brothers meet… instead of being angry… Esau ran to meet him… and embraced him… and fell on his neck and kissed him… and they wept… and Jacob said… if I find favor with you… then accept these gifts from my hand… for truly to see your face… is like seeing the face of God…

Some of us think God is only in this building… in this Temple… but over these last few months… our notions about place have been turned upside down… haven’t they… and it seems as though we’ve been in one long wrestling match with God too… doesn’t it… and for so many of us… this time has been agonizing… but we have begun to experience that God is wherever we are… and is also in the faces of exhausted health care workers… and distraught family members… and those advocating for the public health… and those whom we fear may be angry with us… and when our many notions of normal… don’t line up with God’s one notion of normal… when they don’t reflect enough of God’s light… then God will wrestle with us a little bit more…

And it’s because of this wrestling… that we become able to express more fidelity and faithfulness… because if we’re going to be a part of God’s Kingdom… then there’s some action we need to take… if we’re going to move closer and closer to the Heavenly Banquet… then we need to get out of our spectator seats… and get into the ring… because sometimes… our opponents are ourselves… and we need to stop fighting each other… and wrestle more against our own shortsightedness… and embrace our limps… our imperfections… our humanity… because when God looks at us… God does compassion to us… and we are fed so abundantly with the life inherent in God’s Word… that there are basketfuls left over…